You've got to keep thinking
You can make it through these waves".
I feel like I've been stuck under water for the past few days, struggling for air. If I am sent back to California I will feel completely incomplete and useless and frustrated and terrible and guilty and embarrassed and SAD so so sad. But what else can I do at this point besides wait? I have apologized my heart out, explained over and over again, admitted to my mistakes, promised to change, and yet I still feel like they expect something more. What do you want??? I AM HUMAN. I am irresponsible at times, I make bad decisions, I am flawed, I'm very imperfect, I am learning-I AM HUMAN.
I don't know how to enjoy the happiest season of the year with this weighing in the back of my mind every single second of the day.
P.S. Something funky happened to my first batch of fisheye film, but here's a few pictures at least.